I AM NOT A CIGARETTE, SO PLEASE DON'T DRAG ON ME

Don’t waste your time arguing with people who just want to argue, talk and pontificate - the D & D Committee. I personally can’t do it. The more they talk the more characters and story lines I build in my head. Really, I do. I develop story lines based on what I feel their underlying and intrinsic issues are; or, on anything that distracts me from their la la la wah wah wah can't ain't won't dialogue.

I am occasionally in the presence of someone who often relays stories of people in her life. The thing that strikes me most about these people is their presence in her sphere of being has been long-standing. The second thing that tickles my curiosity is that these people are part of what I call the DRAG and DESPAIR COMMITTEE. This is the committee of people that will drag on you with consistent negativity about your life, about what you want to do, about suggestions to have fun, about ANY and EVERY thing.

For me, the blocking out of the blah blah blah and wah wah wah of such unproductive and dragging dialogue is my defense mechanism for that immediate moment. It is the way I teach myself patience and not to speak in what might be considered a rude or sarcastic manner. In a medium range and more permanent nature, I will eventually sit down and ask myself some questions?

Am I now dragging on other people by relaying stories of the drag and despair committee member?

If there is nothing that I can lend positively and constructively to Miss or Mr. Drag, should I consider whether or not their season of importance in my life has changed?

Do I imply that there is an open invitation to drag me down with the practices of the committee, by never saying - I would like to talk to you about why your words and conversations are always such a drag?

Is my life going to be negatively or positively impacted if I close the door on this perpetual negative energy and instead replace it with life, hope and power?

In the interim, until you finally get to the point where you are either going to pull every single strand of hair from your head one at a time; or have the conversation above with yourself -try these things. First and foremost - be quiet. Stop giving the drag and despair committee information about your circumstances. Second - separate. One of the most profound statements I have ever read in the Bible says simply, remove thyself from the accursed thing. OH BOY! If it is dragging, it is pretty safe to say it is a curse. There is entirely too much bitterness, negativity and demoting of one's spirit for there not to be. Third - get out of familiar territory. You may just need to get a new group of positive people to enjoy and do life with; who can impart wisdom, promote your vision and just hang out with you in love. Fourth - interrogate yourself based on the questions above and be serious. Just because he or she has been a friend for 20 years; does not mean their impact on your life needs to be as great as it is.

Here is what I want you to do while you are still highly interactive with the drag and despair committee member; as they talk, write a note to yourself, advising you to cease from pointless conversations, not to waste others time with mindless words of confusion. Write a reason to say something productive to everyone you encounter. Productivity breeds productivity.

The other thing I have found about the D & D committee members is they are the people in the first line of my thoughts today. They want to argue, they always want to talk about why you are wrong and they are right, they always want to tell someone else what they think you said and what they feel about what they really did not hear. Tragically, before you know it, you will mimic them in the words you speak and the spirit you emanate. You have unwittingly become the newest member of the DRAG and DESPAIR COMMITTEE. So, write a little note to the arguer, saying something as simply as – "I appreciate your energy, maybe next time it won’t interfere with my understanding of what you were trying to relay or on my invitation for you to enjoy living and life."

Above all remember this, you are not a cigarette so do not allow these people to drag on you - otherwise you will end up mashed up and squeezed down into the bottom of an ashtray. Are you not so much more than that?

TALK TO THE HAND

Can you believe she said that? And said it with some sense of power in your life. Can you believe he had the intestinal fortitude to say something that off-hand about you? Even more bewildering, he had the audacity to say it with some sense of power in your life. Well, how about that!

I’m often around people who feel it necessary and absolutely okay to say whatever they choose about my decisions and my capacity of being. That would be okay if I asked for their opinions – which are usually negative, based on their world or far away from my divine conversations. I have learned to engage in a disengaged conversation with them until they are done preaching their correction to me. It has also been my experience that opinions can not be solicited from everyone. You see, some believe that once their OPINION is voiced, it is in fact a DIRECTIVE that you should act on immediately. Troubling is the reality that for many of us we do take the opinions of others as mandates for our lives.

For a long time, I would obsess on the things those people said or thought about me, my personal vision, my personal dreams, my no sense of fashion, the fact that like to keep my finger and toe nails long - even my hair style. Then I started writing the left of what they thought was right. In other words I would write the truth - my truth - and that overruled their opinion. I honestly believe that anyone who gets caught up in the exterior of anything never fully sees its beauty nor experiences its spectacular abilities. So those who offer sought and un-sought opinions, may say it is right and perhaps it is - for them, or even for you. But the decision as to its proper place in your world must be yours completely. A decision to live someone's personal responses also means you make a decision to live someone's consequences.

Remember in pre-school or kindergarten, when you would take your favorite colored-crayon and trace your hands - wasn't that the coolest? Take a look at your hands now, trace your left hand and pen what is left in your life after you silence all of the other opinions, beliefs, notions and attitudes. If everything is silenced, you have QUIET, in the quiet you should begin to HEAR - your true spirit, which means you will sense DIVINE DIRECTION. Imagine that you have never heard any opinion or thought about what you should do and instead with each life line you draw on that left hand: list a purpose for your life, list an item or person that brings a smile or sense of joy, list something silly that makes you laugh. On your life lines dream again - what would you be if you could be anything in the world and how would you become it. Strange, look what you created without everyone's input? A dream and a plan to go get it.

It is something about that left hand. What is left? Left is to edify you, left is to remind you that it is your thought patterns and God’s thought streams that matter, left is to direct you to divine power – for you can do all things… you are more than a conqueror, and why would you expect anyone to understand a "peculiar people." Peculiar are those who would put extreme faith in the unseen and bring its truth to dynamic realities. What is left? Left is your power, in your hand, to be used for your edification. Talk to the hand and it will certainly tell you some awesome things about YOU!

Arise, Write, Release,

I’m E. Claudette Freeman

ARISE, WRITE, RELEASE: THE MORNING HOUR JOURNAL

An e-book full of inspiration and invitations to write your new vision.

THE WRITING IS ON THE WALL

It’s the middle of a horrible week and you feel totally overwhelmed. If one more thing gets added to your schedule YOU WILL ABSOLUTELY GO CRAZY! Oh God - there can not be another problem centered around me - can there? Clutter chokes even the most simple thoughts. You really want to just find a quiet spot to awaken it with your screams.

When we find ourselves in the place of too much and not enough of to get through it – we have to remember to one pivotal thing - just stop for a minute. Stop thinking. Stop processing. Stop accessing. Stop the what if. JUST STOP!

Look at the writing on the wall. Seriously, take a big sheet of paper, it does not have to be a Post-it pad (although those are beautiful); it can simply be a paper bag ripped open or a piece of construction paper. Do not get caught up in the paper! I say that because we are inundated with problems, perplexities and negative possibilities we begin to fixate on all the things that can not help us focus on pushing through the darkness. So, do not allow the paper to become a continuing invitation to stay in darkness. Instead rip up the invitation, by simply grabbing some paper - any kind of paper. Now tape it to the wall and write words, BIG WORDS, little words - but write. Write words that say what you feel. Write word that say what you want to feel. Write words that describe what you felt when.... whatever happened - happened. Write words that say what God is speaking to you - even as you write all over the wall. Here's a little secret, this works just as effectively when you use your computer as the paper and pen.

Now breathe, you’ve released it. Pull out your journal or start a journal, (again don't get caught up in the paper) and have a talk with you about each big word on the wall and watch the clutter organize. You see you begin to breathe as clutter, strife and stress leave your psyche; once you do something happens - peace fills the spot where overwhelmed had become comfortable. Peace clears the way for fruitful and productive thought streams. Your mind and your spirit become centered again and now the words on the wall change.

Remember what I learned the hard way - you can only take care of the things that you can, the others are in the hands of the divine -God and when He feels you are ready to deal with those - He will give you the wisdom to do so. I make it sound real easy, don't I? I assure you it is not. I have been through emotionally-wrenching, professionally-insulting and spiritually-tumultuous times that have left me physically drained and of ill countenance. These were times that were eradicated or eased only through prayer and through my ability to write my truth without intimidation. My big words on the wall surely were similar to yours: STUPID, DESPERATION, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING, DAMN FOOL, GOD DO YOU EVEN CARE. I know that our pain is never easy but it is a challenge of life than can be defeated and used as an awesome stepping stone to our ultimate life, spirit and soul success.

Do not fret about tomorrow, baby it will bring its own stuff, I want you to remember this powerful truth that I am learning to be ALL TOO REAL - Sufficient is the grace you have for today.

Arise, Write, Release,

I’m E. Claudette Freeman

Hey, by the way, join me January 30-31, 2009 at this funky little hotel called HOTEL BIBA in West Palm Beach. It is my first literary empowerment conference and I would love to vibe with you. Here's the link: http://soearise.eventbrite.com.